The Super Bowl has never had a pure Hard Rock or Alternative headliner for the halftime show. I covered my theory for “why” last week, and with respect to The Who, Stones, Petty, U2, Coldplay, and Bruce Springsteen, they don’t fit the bill today’s RockTernative brands would scrape together pennies to send a listener to.
But what if… what if we were hired to run the halftime show and do it differently?
What if the halftime show had to represent Rock history from each team’s city or state? Each city gets 6–8 artists to represent (alive or dead), along with a fun host and misc. celebrity pop-ins. Which team or city would bring the best show?
Take Los Angeles out of the equation and there are some good debates. Some years would be more of a flop, though. I’m not sure what we’d do if the Panthers show up, and it’ll be a Death Metal festival if Tampa makes it back.
But two of the heavy favorites in this fake halftime showdown — Seattle and Boston — are on display this weekend. Here’s a look at the draft boards.
Seattle Rock Super Bowl
· Jimi Hendrix
· Nirvana
· Foo Fighters
· Pearl Jam
· Heart
· Soundgarden
· Alice in Chains
· Host: Sir Mix-A-Lot
New England/Boston Rock Super Bowl
· Aerosmith
· Boston
· Cars
· The J. Geils Band
· Pixies
· Dropkick Murphys
· Hosts: Matt Damon & Ben Affleck
Two superstar lineups. Two very different vibes. Both could be their own festival.
The “brand guy” in me can’t help but notice this is what real life looks like. Cities look, smell, and sound different. So do their audiences. Stations should too. “Local” doesn’t mean risky or small. Being “local” means representing local and being recognized for it.
And what works for KISW or KNDD/The End may not work in Boston. In fact, while we know from experience that RockTernative can work in Boston, the industry has effectively decided it can’t. There is neither a Rock nor Alternative station in Boston outside of HD-2 or online, which is an incredible oversight.
Now that we’ve got business out of the way, I can put some money down on the game and write this off as “work-related.”
It’s Super Bowl Weekend. We have two dream-filled lineups to look at, and a score to settle.
Seattle Rock Super Bowl
Opening Ceremonies
· Host: Sir Mix-A-Lot
· Alice in Chains — “Man in the Box”
· Jimi Hendrix — National Anthem (IYKYK)
Halftime Show
· Host: Sir Mix-A-Lot
· Heart — “Barracuda” (big opening)
· Soundgarden — “Spoonman,” “Black Hole Sun”
· Pearl Jam — “Alive,” “Evenflow”
· Pearl Jam joined by guests to play Temple of the Dog’s “Say Hello 2 Heaven”
· Foo Fighters — “Monkey Wrench,” “Learn to Fly,” “Everlong”
· Nirvana — “In Bloom,” “Come As You Are”
· Nirvana joined by Hendrix, Cornell, Vedder, and others to rip out “Purple Haze” and “Smells Like Teen Spirit”
New England/Boston Rock Super Bowl
Opening Ceremonies
· Hosts: Matt Damon and Ben Affleck
· Mighty Mighty Bosstones — “The Impression That I Get”
· New Kids on the Block — National Anthem (It’s the Super Bowl, relax)
Halftime Show
· Hosts: Matt Damon and Ben Affleck
· Dropkick Murphys — “Shipping Up to Boston” (flags waving, crowd cameras, chaos)
· Cars — “Good Times Roll,” “You Might Think,” “Shake It Up”
· Pixies (live from a Boston landmark) — “Here Comes Your Man”
· Boston — “Foreplay/Long Time,” “Don’t Look Back,” “More Than a Feeling”
· J. Geils — “Freeze-Frame,” “Centerfold”
· J. Geils joined by John Cena and Mark Wahlberg for “Ain’t Nothing But a House Party”
· Aerosmith — “Walk This Way,” “Dream On,” “Sweet Emotion”
Two cities steeped in Rock history. Both could put on a great show they would be proud of. But for our RockTernative purposes — and my prediction for the game — Seattle is the winner, 31–20.
Enjoy the game.
By the way: Boston not having a clear Rock or Alternative radio brand feels like an opportunity waiting for the right broadcaster. If you’re curious, I’m always happy to connect a few historical and strategic dots.
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Keith Cunningham is a music industry and Rock/Alternative columnist for Barrett Media and the founder of Black Box Group, a modern-modeled creative & strategic consultancy built for brands that need strategies with teeth. He’s the former Master of Mayhem at 95.5 KLOS-FM in Los Angeles for over a decade, a nationwide consultant, and has been repeatedly voted one of America’s top Program Directors and strategic thinkers. Keith has built his career by taking multi-million-dollar brands from worst to first and leading Marconi & Gracie award winners along the way. A data nerd with a rock-and-roll heart, he is an advisory council member for St. Jude fundraising, a fantasy football champion, and lover of his daughters & dogs. Reach him at keithblackboxgroup@gmail.com or on LinkedIn or X.
